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[philville dejazzd.com (philville]

   Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element
   yet known to science.
   The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
   neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons,
   giving it an atomic mass of 312.
   These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which
   are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called
   peons.
   Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
   detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
   contact. A tiny a mount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that
   would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years
   to complete.
   Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay,
   but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion
   of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In
   fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since
   each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
   isodopes. 
   This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to
   believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
   concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical
   morass.
   When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an
   element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it
   has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
   Philip "Phil" Tegtmeier
   39 Churchill Drive
   Elverson Pa 19520
   610.525.8949
   And, go to: ... www.PhilvilleUSA.com