Ferrari Mailing List: You know you are a Tiffoso when…….

[Robert W. Garven Jr. (rgarven]

So how many of these things have you done?  I have to admit I have done 95% of these......

 

      If you've ever bought a piece of clothing to "match the car." â

      If you have multiple cars in the family, but everyone refers to the corvette as "THE car" â

      You've driven an hour+ and had to take a day off work to buy a $10 car part (that does not affect the operation of the car in anyway) â

      If your car is 26 years old and you find out that it still has the original fuel filter, and you're HAPPY! â

      If you have more than one car, and the one that is 20 years older than the other runs 10 times better â

      If you know the exact DATE which your car was built (Jan 16, 1974) but forget your girlfriend/wife's birthday (Uh, I was going to get you something honey but I) â

      If you know the exact day you bought your car (April 3, 1999). But forget your anniversary. â

      If you've ever explained (in detail) to your girlfriend who "Dino" is â

      âIf you have 100% cotton towels for your car and you use old, worn-out ones in your bathroom. â

       âIf you refer to your Ferrari as if it were your child. â

      If, instead of your spouse, you carry a picture of your car in your wallet.

      You hang pictures of Ferrariâs in your GARAGE so she's not lonely. â

      If you go out to say goodnight to the Ferrari

      âYou spend more time vacuuming the 20 square feet of carpet in your Ferrari than your 2000 square foot house. â

      Feel that you must scrub the underside, you never know, some mechanic may get the wrong impression of you if it's dirty. â

      Find yourself looking at your reflection in large plate glass as you drive by. â

      If a bird craps on it, you stop turn around and go home to clean it off. â

      You try to order a build sheet for your Ferrari

      âYou have a window sticker hanging in your bedroom. â

      You think all Japanese cars are junk driven by young punk rice boys that want to race you â

      You think there's a chance it may rain.. I'll take the other car

      SUVs aggravate you because they are bigger that you are.. â

      Even though you've never changed oil in any car you've ever owned, you want to do it on your Ferrari because nobody else knows how â

      You go to the drug store to buy cotton swabs for your car instead of your ears. â

      You cause traffic jams as you maneuver your Ferrari around a puddle of water in the street. â

      When nobody is looking, you talk to it and swear that it understands you

      You get very depressed if you've been cruising all day and stopped many times but nobody comes up and says.. "Wow, nice Ferrari!" â

      You keep a shop manual in the bathroom for your reading enjoyment

 

      If you understand that "Owning" does not necessarily mean "Driving".

      You have one pair of sunglasses that are designated Ferrari shades. You never wear them while driving the "other car". â

      You spend half an afternoon and cause bodily harm to yourself trying to get that last little leaf that's stuck to your radiator through that little hole on the right side of the shroud. â

      If every time you talk about your Ferrari to ANYBODY, you say "The Ferrariâ instead of car. â

      If nobody under the age of 30 is allowed in your garage. âIf the weatherman predicts rain and you are VISIBLY upset. â

      You get upset when other Ferrari owners don't wave back. â

      You have more than one Ferrari picture in your house, in every room.

      You wave at other Ferrari owners when you are out for your evening jog.

      Your friends make sure they bring up your car more than you do, when you meet new people. â

      You tell everyone that you will drive yourself when a big group is going out even though there is plenty of room in another vehicle. âAnd everyone fights over who gets to ride with you. â

      You subscribe to Cavallino, Forza, Autoweek & Road & Track â

      You look at parts for other Ferrariâs no matter what model you have.

      While looking to buy a house, garage space and condition is the first thing you look at. â

      You decline a night at the "gentlemen's" clubs with friends, because you need to be up early the next morning to get to the track. â

      You grit you teeth, and scowl, every time you see a Porsche on the road.

      Your 10 year old kid has been programmed to warn his little friends to stay away from the car without you having to prompt him.

 

Robert W. Garven Jr.

rgarven [at] gmail.com

 "The Ferrari is a dream - people dream of owning this special vehicle and for most people it will remain a dream apart from for those lucky few." Enzo Ferrari